Thanks for the swift reply.
I have just installed the hotfix, unfortunately it did not help. However, something happened that might be of interest.
When I tried to re-enable normal startup in system configuration, it wouldn't let me and instead jumped back to selective startup with ESET disabled. Figuring a re-install of ESET would fix it, I tried uninstalling, but it wouldn't let me. The uninstaller hit a wall when it got to the registry entries, saying it cannot delete the keys as it doesn't have sufficient access to them.
Rebooting into safe mode let me properly uninstall, then on another reboot to regular mode, after installing it seems to update fine, but I get a "Communication with driver failed. HIPS is inactive" error, which I've never seen before.
I almost want to say that kind of behaviour reeks of a virus of sorts, but a thourough scan from Malwarebytes didn't pick anything up.
At any rate, I've compressed and uploaded the memory dump, a PM with the link should be in your inbox shortly.
Thanks again.